The End, a New Beginning

T. Pascal has deleted his profile on G+.  That is for the better.  We shall now begin a new fictional blogging stream.  Keep tuned for fiction flashes and, perhaps one day soon, a second novel.

Today's topic is the English exclamation "What the Fuck?"  It is commonly abbreviated "WTF".  One might use this interrogative form in a sentence, "I see you shit the bed.  What the fuck?"  It can be used as a question (as above) or as an exclamatory declaration as in "I see you shit the bed.  What the Fuck!"

Unfortunately, this phrase is poor grammar.  Firstly, there is no referent for "what".  "What" could refer to many things including, but not limited to, "how", "birds", "kumquats", and "why".  Secondly, the term "fuck" is an over-generalised word that has become so overloaded with meanings that it is devoid of meaning.  For example, the following sentences could be misconstrued easily:

"Fuck me, I'm sick." (trans: "Poor me")
"Fuck me, I'm horny." (trans: "I'm a whore")
"Fuck me, I'm dying." (trans: "Aw shit, I'm dead or dying.")
"Fuck me!" (trans:  "I hate myself.")
"Fuck me?" (trans:  "What bad news did you deliver?  I am incredulous.")
"Fuck me, traitor!" (trans: "Et tu, Brutus?")

Leaving aside the lack of clarity in the exclamation, I also bring attention to the fact that the fragment has no verb.  Thus, it cannot move in time.  It shows no action.  Thus, I propose adding verbs, as follows:

"What is the fuck?" (trans: "What's the buzz, tell me what's a-happenin'?")
"What does the fuck say/mean/imply?" (trans: "What do you mean, kind and noble Sir/Madam?")
"What is the actual fuck that this information tells me?" (trans: "How should I interpret this?")
"What are you fucking doing?" (trans: "What manner of activity is this?")
"What kind of fuck is this?" (trans: "What is this thing that is under observation here?")